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Thursday, July 9, 2020

Will It Ever Stop?

I would like to introduce you to one of the most talented, high achievers that I know. His name is Chris Kenny. You can read all about him HERE

Chris is an extremely gifted artist, a baritone. He won the top award from the American Opera Society of Chicago this past year. He likes to say, "I yell pretty." Does he ever! 


But, he has another passion, aviation. A wonderful pilot that I have the pleasure of being able to spend time with. Lucky me! 


A few days ago, Chris and I met to do a little flying. Little did I know that he had taken this picture of me, and posted it on Instagram with his own little inscription. There's a story behind the picture.


While Chris and I were getting the plane ready for our flight, a man walked into the hangar, looked at me, literally turned his back to me and started talking to Chris about what he thought was Chris' airplane. Chris quickly jumped in and told him that he was just along for the ride, the plane belongs to her(me). And yet, the man still couldn't turn and address me. I said nothing and just went on with what I was doing. 

When I was a student pilot, I was signed off to take a long trip on my own, part of my requirements. I got my weather briefing, and all looked fine. As I left Chicago, the clouds were no where near as high as I had been told. Looking to the south, it looked like they were building. I felt that I could probably make it to my destination, but would I be able to make it back? So, rather than keep going, I decided to stop at a small airport that has a wonderful little restaurant where I could get a cup of coffee and a bowl of soup. While I was sitting at the counter, an older man came up and sat next to me. He asked if I had flown in. I told him that I had, and that I was a student pilot. I went on to tell him that I was supposed to do a cross country flight, but the cloud deck had come down, so I decided to stop for lunch and try another day. He looked at me and said, "you are going to make a wonderful pilot. You made a decision and you stuck with it." As the conversation went on, I found out that he was none other than Mr. Clow, the owner of the airport, and a highly decorated WWII pilot. At one point he asked me to tell him about the day I soled. I felt a little intimidated telling this decorated pilot my simple little story. He insisted, and I obliged. Once I finished, he said, "the first day that you climbed into that plane and flew by yourself will never be topped by anything else you will ever do in your life. Everything depended on you, everything." He then went on to say, "I want to tell you something. There are a lot of people who feel that a woman has no place in the cockpit of an airplane. But, you do. Whenever someone says something to you, regardless of who they are, hold your head high and know that you worked so very hard to achieve your ratings. No one gave you anything."

Mr. Clow is sadly no longer with us, but his words remain in my heart. There have been so many times that I have felt him sit on my shoulder and whisper those words in my ear. He was in that hangar a few days ago. 

While Chris and I were out flying, I asked if he had noticed what happened. In that big booming voice of his he said, "how could I have missed it?" Then he told me that when he came back from the restroom, and saw me working away as I do, he took a picture and posted it to Instagram. When we landed, he showed me the picture. I had to smile.

Sadly, there will always be people who think that because of your gender, your race, your age, and so many other crazy reasons, that someone doesn't belong where they are. I've learned that I am not going to change their mind. But, what I can do is live my best life, and do my best to show who I am.

A few years ago I got into an argument with a priest about going for ashes on Ash Wednesday. I told him that there was nothing he could say to convince me to go. I told him that if others don't know who I am the other 364 days a year, then me walking around like a martyr on Ash Wednesday makes me a hypocrite. He had to agree. 

None of us can be perfect, but we can be a light in the world, shining brightly through our words and through our actions.       

14 comments:

  1. Sadly, no. I don't believe it will ever stop. I had one of the silliest conversations ever with a contractor I wanted to hire to do a job specifically for me. I would ask the contractor a question and he would not look at me but directed his answer to my husband, who was standing nearby. Then I would respond, and he would continue to speak directly to my husband. My husband finally walked away, and the contractor finished the conversation looking up at some trees, apparently to avoid admitting he was talking to with a woman. I did not hire him. 😂

    Thank you for introducing us to the multitalented Chris Kenny. What an interesting guy!

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    1. Oh my goodness, I had a similar experience with a contractor! Isn't it just amazing, and so very sad.
      Chris is just amazing! Even if opera isn't your thing. he is so worth seeing perform :)

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  2. Hi Rhonda, Yes I feel your pain as I work in an industry that many see as a "man's job". Many times I have been running the site and someone will ask one of my (male) crew for something and then be sent to me with the comment Nothing happens unless she says it will. I too am lucky as I work with supportive, caring guys who dont feel in any way inferior by working with a woman. Chris is amazing. I hope to hear him sing here in New Zealand one day. Regards, Vicki

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    1. My heart is breaking for all of musician friends as this pandemic is so very devastating for them. The thought of when will they ever be able to work again, and will anyone even come??? But, I would rather be optimistic, this will end, and we will once again enjoy performances. Chris is truly a force in the music world. I know that his journey will ultimately take him to New Zealand :)
      Thanks for sharing your story. You are making such a difference. I believe that because of people like you, the day will come where women are truly treated in an equal manner.

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  3. Many years ago, around 1974 is a good estimate, I was looking through a Heathkit catalogue and called my Dad, who had assembled equipment for use on our boat; Depth sounder, radio, radar, etc. I asked him if he thought I could build a television. He asked me a couple of questions: "Can you read?" Yes. "You know how to sodler because you were in that department at the factory?" Yes. "You know how to follow instructions?" Yes. "You can build a television." And, I did. A 32 inch Heathkit color TV. After I finished the grey screen adjustments, I could not get a picture. So my boyfriend at the time and I schlepped the TV from Saginaw to the Heathkit store in Detroit and had it looked at. One bad part. The guys there were quite surprised that I, rather than my boyfriend, built the TV. "Not bad for a girl." That raised my hackles a bit so the men apologized and told me that I had done a precise and very neat job; much neater than most of their male customers, who could get quite sloppy. I believe I gave it away when I moved to my current address in 1997. I should have kept it.

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    1. I am so impressed!!!! Building a television!!! That is amazing! You made a huge impact on equality, and just by being you, and believing in yourself. And then too, to have such a loving and supportive father. Great story!

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  4. Fabulous Rhonda, inspirational.
    We sewing friends know you are "kickass" at everything you do.

    Stay safe darling friend. xx

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    1. You are so very sweet Marysia :)
      Thank you oxox

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  5. You ROCK! Keep that beautiful head high. My Dad, who also flew in his young days, would be proud of you!!

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    1. Thank you Linda :)
      I hope you are doing well. I've thought of you so often after you shared the health issues.

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  6. I had an uncle who was an aviator; he built the planes he flew. To this day, every time I hear a low flying prop plane some corner of me wants to run outside and see if it's Uncle Jim. My aunt (his wife) accompanied him on many trips, and at age 70 she got her pilot's license 'in case something happened' to him while they were flying. He had a stroke or heart attack walking out of a restaurant a couple of years ago, and I don't think she still flies, but she was a capable pilot when she did. You would like her, I think.

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    1. Lisa, you made my day when I read your note. She learned to fly at 70!!! That is beyond inspiring!!! I haven't had the pleasure of meeting your aunt, but I already love her :)

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  7. It is sad but there will always be those with a closed mind that make others feel less than they are. Totally agree that we need to be our best selves not only by our actions towards others but by calling out bigoted behaviour.

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    1. I think that jealousy sits at the foundation of so much of this. Human nature, yes. But that's a choice people make for themselves. My friends are like a kaleidoscope of colors, and hail from all parts of the world. The joy and the knowledge that they have bestowed upon me is immeasurable. I hope that in some small way, my actions speak loudly and help to at least somewhat open the minds of those who have chosen to close them.

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